{"id":2496,"date":"2019-05-03T09:00:10","date_gmt":"2019-05-03T09:00:10","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.editage.com\/insights\/ive-been-feeling-down-flat-unsatisfied-unfulfilled-whatever-you-want-to-call-it\/"},"modified":"2025-04-05T05:54:19","modified_gmt":"2025-04-05T05:54:19","slug":"ive-been-feeling-down-flat-unsatisfied-unfulfilled-whatever-you-want-to-call-it","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.editage.com\/insights\/ive-been-feeling-down-flat-unsatisfied-unfulfilled-whatever-you-want-to-call-it","title":{"rendered":"I’ve been feeling down, flat, unsatisfied, unfulfilled, whatever you want to call it"},"content":{"rendered":"

Three weeks ago I opened up about how I was struggling with motivation, productivity anxiety and all that fun stuff (here<\/a>). I came up with some solutions and to be fair, I have been using them and they have been helping to improve my productivity. However, over the past two weeks that unavoidable feeling of anxiety reared it\u2019s ugly head again. This time, though, it was different and I couldn\u2019t just blame it on my PhD workload. I contemplated not writing this because I didn\u2019t want this to become a negative space but a few PhD students have told me that they identified with my last post so I thought it was worth talking about\u2026<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve been feeling down, flat, unsatisfied, unfulfilled, whatever you want to call it\u2026<\/p>\n

Why you might ask? Well truth is\u2026. I have no idea!!! And being upset for no particular reason infuriates me! I think it\u2019s mostly a frustration at myself for having so many amazing opportunities at my fingertips yet still being unsatisfied with my life. I live in a beautiful city, I\u2019m healthy, I have a good support network, I\u2019m doing research that is worth doing\u2026 I\u2019m so lucky! Hence why I was getting so frustrated with myself.<\/p>\n

It all came to a head last week when I had a bit of an anxiety attack (I didn\u2019t realise that\u2019s what it was at the time, it\u2019s only something I can say now, in hindsight). I finally sat at my desk at 4pm after avoiding work all day and I just cried. I couldn\u2019t face it. I didn\u2019t understand what was happening to me and I had hit this feeling of rock bottom. It was awful but I\u2019m glad it happened. It gave me the kick I needed to make some changes in my mindset.<\/p>\n

This week, my flatmates were away so I was home alone. It was the perfect opportunity for me to tackle my issues head-on. I\u2019ve had a lot of time with myself the past week and I wanted to share how I\u2019m trying to better manage this\u2026.<\/p>\n

\"I\u2019ve<\/p>\n

Image credit<\/u>: www.phdcomics.com<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n

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  1. Don\u2019t compare yourself to others\u00a0<\/strong>\u2013 I feel like we don\u2019t talk about jealously enough. It\u2019s a horrible yet sometimes unavoidable emotion. I found that I was becoming jealous of people in my life e.g. all of my friends who aren\u2019t doing a PhD, get to work a 9-5 job and can leave their work at work and of people online e.g. a health and fitness blogger who lives by the beach in Australia (but who wouldn\u2019t be jealous of that?!). I don\u2019t have much advice for you here but what I can say is that the grass is always greener on the other side. Always. We all have our own stresses and strains. It\u2019s worth recognising the discomfort of feeling jealous. It\u2019s okay to admit it. But the key is to acknowledge it, sit with the emotion for a while and then let it go. For me, it\u2019s harder to let go if I\u2019m in denial.<\/li>\n
  2. Digital detox\u00a0<\/strong>\u2013 Take a break from social media and learn to be comfortable without technology, even if it\u2019s just for a day or a week.\u00a0Social media is a double-edged sword. It\u2019s an amazing world for connecting, sharing and collaborating but for those of us who love to procrastinate, it has a dark side. I was using it to escape reality. Being home alone and cutting down screen time allowed me to invest in a bit more self-care. I cooked, read, journaled, listened to podcasts (I couldn\u2019t cut them out- I\u2019m addicted\u2026gimme a bit of slack)! I didn\u2019t totally go cold turkey, I just tried to stop mindlessly scrolling and being a slave to my phone.<\/li>\n
  3. Minimize your daily to-do list\u00a0<\/strong>\u2013 Simple but effective. I\u2019ve found that assigning myself less daily tasks and actually achieving everything by 5pm puts me in a much better headspace.<\/li>\n
  4. Go to your friends for advice\u00a0<\/strong>\u2013 If you only take one thing away from this post, then let it be this. I\u2019m so lucky to have friends who I can talk to anything about at any time. Ultimately, they pulled me out of my rut by reassuring me and giving me the practical advice I needed to move forward (so credit to them for points 1-3\u2026 it was all their idea). I was listening to the podcast “Happy Place” where Kirsty Young said that the best advice she has ever recieved was when she interviewed Daniel Kahneman, a Nobel prize wining scientist –\u00a0He said that when you have a problem, whatever it is, you should listen to your true friends because they are totally invested in your life and have your best interests at heart, and they also have the clarity of thought that distance brings.<\/em><\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    How beautiful is that??? Now you know why I couldn\u2019t give up the podcasts this week! When you find a good one they\u2019re full of really insightful advice.<\/p>\n

    Implementing structure and routine helps me to find my groove but I recognise that we\u2019re all different and what works for me\u00a0won\u2019t necessarily work for everyone. As much as I am a creature of habit who loves routine, the key is not to panic if you break it! Sometimes you need that Wednesday lie in or you have to work on a deadline over the weekend. That\u2019s the beauty of working independently – you get to be flexible! The past few weeks have reminded me that doing a PhD is going to be an emotional rollercoaster but it\u2019s up to me to learn to enjoy it. Has anyone else experienced times like this? I\u2019m sure we all have at some point and let me tell you, it\u2019s pretty liberating to acknowledge it, own it and share it!<\/p>\n

    I\u2019m looking forward to the next few months, I\u2019m going to be super busy (which I thrive off of) and I couldn\u2019t be more excited! Now it\u2019s time to enjoy a well deserved weekend in the sunshine.<\/p>\n

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    Katie Gambier-Ross (<\/em><\/p>\n