{"id":2760,"date":"2019-05-30T08:28:48","date_gmt":"2019-05-30T08:28:48","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.editage.com\/insights\/have-i-really-been-here-for-an-entire-year\/"},"modified":"2025-01-15T06:35:07","modified_gmt":"2025-01-15T06:35:07","slug":"have-i-really-been-here-for-an-entire-year","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.editage.com\/insights\/have-i-really-been-here-for-an-entire-year","title":{"rendered":"Have I really been here for an entire year?"},"content":{"rendered":"

So, again, it\u2019s been a while.<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Wasn\u2019t it just January like two weeks ago? Why is it so sunny and hot?<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Time has flown since my last post.\u00a0I\u2019ve dived into my new internship head-first. I\u2019ve begun to code my fieldnotes (and you know what that means: pretty colors!). And I will get to that one interview I still have to transcribe and translate. And those twenty 20 internet tabs that are still open on my browser. Eventually. [Cue flashback.]<\/span><\/span><\/span>
\u00a0<\/p>\n

\"Default
\u00a0<\/p>\n

And speaking of time, which also happens to be a major theme of my fieldwork research (can you tell I\u2019ve been consumed?), today marks one year since I touched down on Jordanian soil to begin PhD fieldwork. And it also happens to be my 25th birthday.<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

Both of these markers terrify me.<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

The fieldwork milestone is scary because a PhD student never thinks she has enough fieldnotes\/interviews\/observations\/data to work with. As my fieldwork has mostly been a very long struggle uphill, it\u2019s easy to forget just how much information I have gathered in this year.<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

And 25 is\u2026 well\u2026<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

It\u2019s a big number. It\u2019s not that I\u2019m about to have a quarter life crisis (I think?). On the contrary, I see this number as motivation to grow more as a person, to reflect on the journey, and to move forward with a clearer mind. Where did I think I would be at 25 when I was younger, and where do I want to be now?<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

25 is a symbolic opportunity for me to make some personal evaluations. I\u00a0see May 10, 2018 as my new year. And I have some resolutions. But first, this marker calls for reflections.<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

24 has been one of my most challenging years to date. Between fieldwork, being more deeply immersed in Jordanian culture than I have before, internships that have felt more like jobs, being invited to give academic talks, and the usual apartment struggles, I feel like I have been catapulted out of being a student. But at the same time, it\u2019s also felt like a mere simulation. After all, I do have to go back to Cambridge for at least a year to actually\u00a0finish<\/i>\u00a0being a student.<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I won\u2019t share here what I\u2019ve learned in the past year; I don\u2019t want to follow my last post, which was quite reflective, with another reflection. Not to mention that I\u2019ve learned so much that I could write an entire dissertation analyzing my experience in the last year. But no one has time for that. So instead I include below a short listicle of some of my realizations because \u2018listicle\u2019 is more fun-sounding than \u2018dissertation.\u2019<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

    \n
  1. I have learned more about myself in this year than in any other, and I\u2019ve discovered more about why I am the way I am.<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/li>\n
  2. I know my strengths and weaknesses.<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/li>\n
  3. I have a better idea of what I want and what I don\u2019t want.<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/li>\n
  4. Living and working abroad has made me learn about life\u00a0very\u00a0<\/i>quickly.<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/li>\n
  5. I can speak Arabic! I can understand Arabic! Arabic is no longer the biggest challenge in my work! I am bilingual! Alhamdulillah!<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/li>\n
  6. I was introduced at a talk I gave as \u201csoon-to-be Dr. Gatter,\u201d and I realized that the title isn\u2019t why I\u2019m doing a PhD. But it\u2019s a nice perk.<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/li>\n
  7. I have slowly begun to transition from a student who is just learning to one who can also teach and publish articles.<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/li>\n
  8. Some of my opinions have changed, many have been reaffirmed, and a lot have become very confused.<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/li>\n
  9. Fieldwork often makes me feel like I am on Mars. And that\u2019s not just because I\u2019m in the desert.<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/li>\n
  10. Friends and family have helped to ground me when I feel like I am on Mars.<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/li>\n
  11. Netflix, podcasts, yoga, and taking care of my mint plant, Clara, are seriously therapeutic.<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/li>\n
  12. Making healthier choices includes saying no more often.<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/li>\n
  13. I\u2019m ready for a real job.<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/li>\n
  14. I feel like I\u2019ve aged ten years in the last year.<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/li>\n
  15. I\u2019m going to need some time to decompress after all this.<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    Well that became a bit depressing. But this is what I have to work with over the next 365 days. And although 24 is over, my fieldwork is not!<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

    \u00a0<\/p>\n

    As for today, I\u2019m just going to enjoy and embrace turning 25. The resolutions can start tomorrow.<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

    \n

    Melissa Gatter (<\/i>@melgatter<\/i><\/a>) is a <\/i>PhD candidate at the University of Cambridge. This story was published on May 10, 2018, on Melissa\u2019s blog, <\/i>The World Behind the Curtain<\/i><\/a> (available <\/i>here<\/i><\/a>), and has been republished here with her permission.<\/i><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    So, again, it\u2019s been a while. Wasn\u2019t it just January like two weeks ago? Why is it so sunny and hot? Time has flown since my last post.\u00a0I\u2019ve dived into my new internship head-first. I\u2019ve begun to code my fieldnotes (and you know what that means: pretty colors!). And I will get to that one […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1454,"featured_media":33313,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"inline_featured_image":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[2414],"tags":[2666,2454],"new_categories":[],"new_tags":[],"series":[],"class_list":["post-2760","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-inspiring-researcher-stories","tag-phd-life","tag-researcher-stories"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nHave I really been here for an entire year?<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Today marks one year since I touched down on Jordanian soil to begin PhD fieldwork. And it also happens to be my 25th birthday. And guess what? 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